tristancafe - ang tambayan ng mga walang magawa sa buhay
frontpage music karaoke games forum berks columns quizzes crosswords
Main Forum - Category:Patawa Ka Talaga
V3mTot is Back....
posted by vemtot (Dec 04, 2008 @ 7:01AM) views: 1040
T: Paano mo babatiin ang ex mo ngayong Christmas season?
S: “Maligayang Pastko! Merry EX-mas!”
***
“HIDDEN SOLDIERS!”
Sagot ni Pacman sa tanong kung ano ang World’s Number 1 Shampoo
***
Banat na pam-Pasko…
BOY: Pwede bang makahingi ng litrato mo?
GIRL: Bakit gusto mo ng litrato ko?
BOY: Para maipakita ko kay Santa Claus what I really want for Christmas…
***
Sa isang restaurant…
LOLA: Pwe! Ano ba ‘tong steak na ‘to?! Di ko manguya! Ang tigas! Waiter!
WAITER: (tinikman ang steak) Malambot naman po, ah?! At makatas pa!
LOLA: Paanong hindi lalambot at kakatas ‘yan eh 30 minuto ko nang nginunguya ‘yan?!
***
BOSS: (galit) Ang gusto ko sa secretary ay listo, hindi absent-minded! Na­pahiya ako sa meeting dahil sa kapabayaan mo!
SEKRETARYA: Sorry, sir. Sa susunod, hindi ko kalilimutang isara ang zipper ninyo!
***
T: Bakit kinukusot ng mga babae ang kanilang mga mata paggising sa umaga?
S: Wala kasi silang betlog na kakamutin.
***
HOLDAPER: Pare, holdap ‘to! Ibigay mo lahat ng pera mo!
CONRAD: Pare naman, wala pa akong pera. Bukas pa ang sweldo ko… Bukas mo na lang ako hol­dapin!
***
TEACHER: Alin ang mas madalas gamitin, period or comma?
GORIO: Kama, ma’am! Ang period, buwanan lang. Ang kama, kahit may period, maaaring gamitin!
***
DALAGA: Hoy! Ba­ngag ka ba?!
BINATA: Hindi ako nagdodroga.
DALAGA: Eh bakit ganyan ka makatingin?
BINATA: Naaadik ako sa ‘yo.
***
Q: How do you define SUPER EMO?
A: It’s when you see two dogs in the street being sweet with each other, and you say… “Buti pa sila.”
***
Para saan pa at nabuhay sila… kung patay na patay naman sila sa akin?! -vemtot
***
AHENTE: Sir, ‘yung bagong supermarket na dineliveran natin, nagsara na!
BOSS: Ha?! Taena! P1M binagsak natin du’n, ah?! Bakit daw nagsara?!
AHENTE: Kasi, gabi na raw!
***
If someone tells you, “I will love you with an everlasting love… I’ll never leave you. Above everything you’re the only one…”
Just answer back, “Naks! I love the way you lie!”
***
May isang devil na bumulong sa akin.
Gusto raw niyang manggulo ng taong mababait…
Ibinigay ko ang pangalan mo.
Sabi ng devil, “Hindi pwede… boss namin ‘yan! Iba na lang!”
 
:: comments ::
Note: New comments (since you last visited this post) are marked with
sweet_tooth19    •reply Dec 4, 2008 @ 7:38 AM
 
: ?  kinakamot b un pg bagong gising : ? 
  vemtot    •reply    Dec-4-08@8:53AM
oo...
  sweet_tooth19    •reply    Dec-4-08@9:41AM
really : ? 


baket?
  vemtot    •reply    Dec-5-08@7:07AM
d ko maipalwnag sau pro alm ko msrap lang.... : n a u g h t y : 
  superrod    •reply    Dec-4-08@8:55AM
hahahhahahah : r o l l : 
  naodin    •reply    Dec-4-08@8:19PM
hahaha... :scroll: hahaha..
mhyne28    •reply Dec 4, 2008 @ 12:34 PM
 
If someone tells you, “I will love you with an everlasting love… I’ll never leave you. Above everything you’re the only one…”
Just answer back, “Naks! I love the way you lie!”


^-^ i lurve dat : r o l l : 
  guillerus_dauphin    •reply    Dec-5-08@6:10AM
di ba sa Bible yan? I will never leave you or forsake you Hebrews 13:5
I love you with an everlasting love Jeremiah 31:3 : s m i l e : 
  smidgie11    •reply    Dec-9-08@10:09PM
char uie.. gabasa ng bible.. hehe.. : n o t w o r t h y : 
Malz    •reply Dec 4, 2008 @ 3:37 PM
 
: l o l : 
CookieMonster    •reply Dec 4, 2008 @ 6:37 PM
 
Hidden Soldiers.hahahaha : l o l : 
chikurita    •reply Dec 4, 2008 @ 7:16 PM
 
Para saan pa at nabuhay sila… kung patay na patay naman sila sa akin?! -vemtot


.. : n a u g h t y :  yun oh!!!! : n a u g h t y : 

: n o t w o r t h y : 
  chikurita    •reply    Dec-4-08@7:19PM
..yeah..i love the way you lie.. : n a u g h t y : 
  vemtot    •reply    Dec-4-08@8:07PM
yan ang pamatay!!! sa bagong taon....
  chikurita    •reply    Dec-5-08@4:57AM
: l o l :  : l o l : 
  bheby_mhie    •reply    Dec-5-08@12:11AM
yeah ryt..!! : l o l :  : l o l :  ..
  chikurita    •reply    Dec-5-08@4:59AM
: n a u g h t y : 
  vemtot    •reply    Dec-5-08@6:53AM
: n a u g h t y : 
  vemtot    •reply    Dec-5-08@6:54AM
yha left...
  bheby_mhie    •reply    Dec-5-08@8:56AM
yeah front..!! : m a d : 
  vemtot    •reply    Dec-5-08@9:12AM
yeah back ohh ano kyang next...
  jhing_carl    •reply    Dec-5-08@7:39PM
yeah top! : g r i n :  : g r i n : 
  bheby_mhie    •reply    Dec-6-08@7:23AM
yeah down! : m a d : 
  vemtot    •reply    Dec-6-08@4:35PM
yeah side...last na sana 2 ....
  bheby_mhie    •reply    Dec-8-08@3:20PM
yeah middle.!! : m a d :  : m a d : 

bakit ayaw mo na sundan eh meron pa? : m a d : 
  vemtot    •reply    Dec-10-08@11:37AM
baka san tayo mapunta eh : n a u g h t y :  : n a u g h t y :  : n a u g h t y : 
sour_graping    •reply Dec 4, 2008 @ 10:25 PM
 
galing! : n o t w o r t h y : 
  vemtot    •reply    Dec-5-08@6:52AM
: n o t w o r t h y : 
bheby_mhie    •reply Dec 5, 2008 @ 12:10 AM
 
May isang devil na bumulong sa akin.
Gusto raw niyang manggulo ng taong mababait…
Ibinigay ko ang pangalan mo.
Sabi ng devil, “Hindi pwede… boss namin ‘yan! Iba na lang!”


: l o l :  : l o l :  : l o l :  : l o l :  adik..!
  vemtot    •reply    Dec-5-08@6:57AM
d nmn...tara lipad tayo..
  bheby_mhie    •reply    Dec-5-08@8:57AM
ge tara..!!
  vemtot    •reply    Dec-5-08@8:58AM
kapit...wag ka nmang malikot..kulit mo sipain kta eh...
  bheby_mhie    •reply    Dec-6-08@7:23AM
weh di nga???

di naman kaya bleeeehhhh..!! : m a d : 
haseyama08    •reply Dec 5, 2008 @ 3:05 AM
 
AHENTE: Sir, ‘yung bagong supermarket na dineliveran natin, nagsara na!
BOSS: Ha?! Taena! P1M binagsak natin du’n, ah?! Bakit daw nagsara?!
AHENTE: Kasi, gabi na raw! : l o l :  : l o l :  : l o l : 
  vemtot    •reply    Dec-5-08@6:57AM
: c h e e r : 
argus_bloodbeard02    •reply Dec 5, 2008 @ 4:07 AM
 
: l o l :  : l o l : 
  vemtot    •reply    Dec-5-08@6:57AM
: c h e e r : 
jacy_amaze    •reply Dec 5, 2008 @ 4:51 AM
 
May isang devil na bumulong sa akin.
Gusto raw niyang manggulo ng taong mababait…
Ibinigay ko ang pangalan mo.
Sabi ng devil, “Hindi pwede… boss namin ‘yan! Iba na lang!” : l o l :  NG BANAY KO LET THE BEST EVIL BE DOING GOOD FOR YOU so : s m i l e : 
  vemtot    •reply    Dec-5-08@6:58AM
: c h e e r : 
krizes    •reply Dec 5, 2008 @ 5:29 AM
 
i lab da way u lie
sabay : k i s s : 


: r o l l : 
  vemtot    •reply    Dec-5-08@6:59AM
: n o t w o r t h y : 
vemtot    •reply Dec 5, 2008 @ 6:57 AM
 
: c h e e r : 
wEirdO14    •reply Dec 7, 2008 @ 7:41 AM
 
dedz n dedz pla sau a.. haha.. : l o l : 
a3lang    •reply Dec 8, 2008 @ 5:43 AM
 
: l o l :  : l o l :  : l o l : 
sSuTiLL    •reply Dec 10, 2008 @ 1:10 AM
 
: b o w : 
zZzbhatzZz    •reply Dec 11, 2008 @ 2:36 AM
 
: h m m : 
yasmin13    •reply Dec 16, 2008 @ 5:02 PM
 
tibay!!! :LOL:

:: leave a comment

You need to be logged-in order to post comments.
Still do not have an account?
Register for free

newer post:
I love babies		 older post:
paG nLu2ngkoT aQ T.T
login:

password:

Not yet a member?
Register for free!

Lost password?
last 10 comments
in this category:
In: Jokes v. 1.5
by atmosphere143
[01/07/2009 4:04AM]
In: testing lang.. Funny Jokes 101
by DYOBAN
[01/06/2009 8:49AM]
In: Jokes v.2.1 My old Jokes
by hunnie_bhie
[01/06/2009 8:21AM]
In: Breaking News
by missingxye
[01/06/2009 6:23AM]
In: Ang alamat kung bakit sinungalin
by mr18273
[01/06/2009 6:00AM]
In: Top 20 Signs that a movie is Gaw
by mr18273
[01/06/2009 5:05AM]
In: Jokes v.2.1 My old Jokes
by haseyama08
[01/06/2009 2:59AM]
In: Jokes v.2.1 My old Jokes
by Mackaroo
[01/06/2009 2:54AM]
categories:
Love & Intimacy (71011)
Arts & Entertainment (7634)
Lifestyle & Culture (3327)
Politics & Issues (2960)
Poetry & Fiction (9380)
Random Thoughts (10305)
Forwarded Thingies (7397)
FrendzCorner/ShoutOutz (21462)
Games & Fun Questions (2365)
Patawa Ka Talaga (2338)
Tristancafe Musikahan (3862)
Careers & Work Stuff (1538)
School Matters (3263)
Technology & Internet (4042)
Classifieds & Advertisements (3617)
Tristancafe Halo-Halo (1569)
Barangay Tristan (1752)
Site Announcements (44)
There are 13 people online now
Google
Web tristancafe.com
Random Love Quotes